Leaving Words Behind

Stop me when I bore you
Though I may ignore you
what I say is true
out of the blue...

...

I used to lay awake and write my heart out
I'd pour my heart out
I'd tear my heart out
. .. .. .. ..

With a longing, yearning, burning hung-desire
my heart's desire
my heart on fire
. .. .. .. ..

and melodies of love would fill my head (our of the blue)
and endless words of love would fill my bed (out of the blue)
and she would sleep beside me peacefully (out in the blue)
and I'd wish she'd awaken to know me (this is true)

but she never read the words
all the songs she never heard
I would leave them everywhere
but it seemed she didn't care

why she never read the words
seemed to me to be absurd
even though I was always there
it seemed my heart could disappear (into the blue)

stop me if I reach you
I don't want to teach you
I don't ant to sell you
just want to tell you
how I feel
so maybe we could make
something real...

...

she stayed out there
she would not share
I was right here
. .. .. .. ..

out of the blue is where you find me
painting pictures in the sky
out of the blue, so don't remind me
unless you can share this high
out of the blue, it may suprise you
how happy I am alone
when I know we don't have to
grow up all alone...


all the intimacies
that make intensities
emotional meaningful lifetimes
where left to live within my rhymes

all the passions remained
on the physical planes
and I was left to wonder why
we could communicate like this
but she wouldn't even try

so I left the words behind
my heart lied
my heart died

and I kept it all inside
but I tried
how I tried

to live her way
what can I say
I wonder what her life is like today...

out of the blue, this is the story
of the shooting stars that missed
out of the blue, love without glory
just the blissful passion kiss
and in the end it's all forgotten
lost over thousands of years
without words, there is no story
only faint laughter and tears
and it appears
lingering fears

...

some people are afraid of words I guess
they have other ways to express their happiness
maybe that was all there was to it in the end
in the end
in the end
in the end...

out of the blue, there is no ending
only memories gone by
left behind and unrecorded
so was it all a lie?
out of the blue, there is no meaning
unless we share something more
that the physical moments
is that all we are here for?

I write words
looking for
the musical score

...

will you ever read the words
all the songs you never heard
I still leave them everywhere
waiting for someone to care

will you ever read the words
is this message so absurd?
I believe it was always here
even when we let it disappear

it remains.

Out of the blue is where you find me...


.....


now I live within the words
all the songs you never heard
I still leave them everywhere
for anyone who cares

now I love within the words
and it may seem so absurd
but I was still always there
right now
right here....... .. .... . .......... ......... . ......

Out of the blue is where you find me...

you know it's true
it's here for you
if you care
if you share
if you dare
come
out of the blue

Until This Body Is Blue

Does anybody hear me?
Does anybody feel the way I do?
Is anybody listening?
Does anybody live a life that’s true?
Can anybody overcome the fears that seem
To be condemning the average dream
Can anybody overcome the walls that grow
as sense and logic falls
Does anybody live without hypocrisy
As the way of this world become part of me?
I don’t want to be that confused
I don’t want to be that self abused
If my love is to be refused
It won’t be by me I will live honestly
I will give everything I can give
I will make love the way I live
I will share I will care
and I will not let fear
Keep me from being aware
I have a choice in everything I do
I won’t ignore what I know is true
I won’t hurt me just to satisfy you
Even if my message never gets through
I will say it until this body is blue
Love is the only way that’s true
Love is the only right thing to do

As Much As Anything Else

An email arrived to let me know that a blog entry from 2005 had a broken link, so I went back to the entry and fixed the link and added another half dozen links cuz it was there, out of the blue. Then, as if guided by some unseen force (like the brain cells in the head, ya know?), continued the retrospective journey through the previous daily (kind of randomly started in the middle, for what it's worth) that was not exactly mind blowing, but it was as profoundly moving on some level (if I was awake) as anything, true story. Then, as if guided by yet another email, I almost discovered the strangest man on the internet again, by many names known as many strangers are.

and I had friends once
true friends, real friends, once
friend who would take care of me
if I was falling down drunk
or helpless in some other way
the way I helped so many
yesterday

and sometimes I wonder who cares
and sometimes I wonder why
sometimes I wonder who's out there
sometimes I wonder eye to eye
but everyone turns and looks away
nobody ever wants to stay
I seem to ask too much of humanity
all I ask for is... honesty

so sometimes I just throw caution to the winds
sometimes I wonder if it means anything
sometimes I wonder where I've been
sometimes I wonder why I sing

what do you see
philosophy?
honestly
do you even know me

After all is said and done, can't we just have fun?

Connections

“Where there is great love, there are always wishes.”

“There are some things you learn best in calm, and some in storm.”

“That is happiness; to be dissolved into something complete and great.”

But what really came out of the blue was...

“Some memories are realities, and are better than anything that can happen to one again.”

And all I could say was...

Oh wow, just an awefull (as opposed to awful, so perhaps awefilled is a better word, if it is a word, but before I digress to far from the point filled with awe and oh wow), oh wow. This morning I wrote this letter and when I get to my office I the wind blow the desk calendar to the quote on today’s calendar page.

“Some memories are realities, and are better than anything that can happen to one again.”

I know a few people who might actually really get that (perhaps deeper than they want to go). Hello out there, if you do. It is a quote I’ve lived in this life and the oh wow comes because I do not believe I ever read the words in that quote before. Thank you Willa Cather. From what I read, I probably would never pick up one of your books based purely on the subject matter, but I will be looking for your letters that were published in the last few years, with great respect, in case your really did not want them published as I read in a Publisher’s Weekly article.

Whenever I read about someone who lived long before I lived I wonder what their life might have been like and usually, I shudder at the thought of living in their times. The level of ignorance, repression, and delusion around me today is way higher than anything I want to be around, or in. I find it challenging to imagine the past human cultures as any more enlightened or willing to expand the possibilities of thought and perspective than we are today and as I said, today is stifling outside of my mind. Maybe you just had to be there.

Or maybe you just have to read the letter to feel it.

I could be wrong. The age of instant global information may actually create more oppression of thought, or at least more openly voiced (and often violent) conflict and oppression of thought than the age when information took months to travel the globe and much of one’s life was never known outside of a very small circle in their own lifetime. Still, being insulated by lack of communication in smaller bubbles would not be conducive to a world I want to live in any more than this world today.

“Some memories are realities, and are better than anything that can happen to one again.”

Some memories are not even memories, but they are more real than anything that can ever happen.

The mind is an amazing entity, experience, and place to be once we remove the shackles of fear, stop defending ignorance, stop pretending knowledge (no less fighting over theories), and open it to the relatively infinite possibilities.

And then…. play with the connections without spending too much time or energy wondering (or debating) whether they are coincidence or not. Like a six letter last name starting with C, for instance lol lam laa).

Just days before The First of May

I Still Imagine

I still imagine
mostly when I am asleep
I still have dreams
and promises to keep

I let distractions
keep me in a daze
a life out of control
without the purple haze
minor infractions
keep me off my game
a world of apathy
a world of guilt and shame
a world of delusions
a world of lies and pain
a world of madness
a world of going insane
a world of sadness
a word of inside a brain
I still imagine
we can love again

was it just your innocence
or did you really understand
would you live another life
always holding my hand
can two become one in this world
or is that fantasy
can fairy tales become real
what is reality?

I still imagine
a world living as one
with no possessions
nothing to spoil the fun

there is more to this
waiting for you
your part is for you to write
you know it's true

two hands holding
two hands working
one being living
one shared life

to hearts beating
two minds bonding
one direction
man and wife
equal partners
one shared life

Let Yourself Love (Unconditionally)

The precious comes
out of the blue
it's never expected
and sometimes rejected
out of surprise
out of fear
but fear can be overcome
to let something new
change everything
like a new song you sing
out loud and free
fearlessly

True love comes
out of the blue
it's never expected
though sometimes rejected
out of surprise
out of fear
but fear can be overcome
when the heart is true
let it touch your soul
let it take control
let yourself be
in love

honestly
openly
completely
totally
endlessly
for all to see
let yourself love
unconditionally

Let yourself come
out of the blue
it's sometimes rejected
but when it's accepted
there is no better
feeling, it's true
being in love
is the best thing we can do

It is the precious
It is the magic
it is the answer
blowing in the wind

It is the treasure
It is the wonder
it is where we're going
and where we've been

Don't try to hide it
and pleaae don't waste it
holding it back
has to be the worst sin

let it flow inward
let it flow outward
let it connect you
to the ultimate win

Let it comes
out of the blue
it's never expected
though sometimes rejected
out of surprise
out of fear
but fear can be overcome
when the heart is true
let it touch your soul
let it take control
let yourself be
in love

honestly
openly
completely
totally
endlessly
for all to see
let yourself love
unconditionally

it's something you do
let your heat be true
and let the precious
come to you
let the precious
become you

(The Precious )

Maybe Better

This blog may have a life of it's own. The occasional return of thoughts that may still be mine alone. Or maybe there is something more created here. What it is... is not exactly clear. Maybe it's up to you to decide when you define what comes out of the blue.

Out of the blue is where you find me
when I want a simple high
out of the blue may just remind me
that I still don't want to die
out of the blue, what does it tell you?
can be make it on our own?
of course we can if we want to but
do you really want to be alone?

I don't know about you, but I miss the bliss of a kiss.

Kiss is where love lives
Kiss is where love lives
Kiss is where love lives

it could be a peck on the cheek
a simple closeness we might never speak
it could be just blown in the wind
a distance closeness to remember where we've been

it does not have to lead to more
it does not have to be the end
it can remember innocence
it can be comfort from a friend

why are you so afraid?
what plans have your mind made?
why do you read so much
into a simple touch?

of skin
maybe you fear
what you hold in

Don't you know that you define what it takes... and what it gives?
Kiss is where love lives
Kiss is where love lives
Kiss is where love lives

so yes it could be a deep dark abyss
where emotions simmer like lava ready to erupt at any time
and yes it could be the heavenly bliss
where happy ever after beings the final rhyme

and yes it could be even more than this
for everything we want and miss
lives in a kiss

if you could only be honest and share
if you could only see you're better when you care
if you could only accept it for just what it is
there is no end to what it takes or what it gives
Kiss is where love lives
Kiss is where love lives
Kiss is where love lives

And maybe that is why so many fear the touch
lips are so sensitive, lips can feel so much
and maybe that is why so many eat or cry or live a lie
hiding what they miss without the kiss - letting love die

don't give up, you can still try
learn caring is the highest high
it gives birds wings it gives fish fins
it is where everything worth anything begins
There is no end to what it takes or what it gives
Kiss is where love lives
Kiss is where love lives
Kiss is where love lives

Better Days (Song of Silence)

I wish I had more positive news
and a more positive perspective
but I am not making my wishes
come true to well these days

Maybe I am just paying some dues
or simply lost somewhere reflective
but life is far from auspicious
and a song of silence plays

I don't want to be depressing
and I still laugh a lot
even as I complain I still
appreciate what I've got

I don't want to be disappointed
I should not have expected more
accepting life as it is may be
what we are living for

Still a voice inside me scratches
at the corner of my heart
it tells me to raise my standards
and not settle in my art

It tells me to trust my instincts
and to reach for what is real
I may be wrong, but does it matter
if this is how I feel?

My feelings are as valid as yours
The world is hiding behind doors
Afraid to share love honestly
and I am not satisfied

So I will ask for more from you
and giving more is what I'll do
to my own self I shall be true
until the day I die
that is how I get high

So I wish I had more positive news
and a more positive perspective
but I am not making my wishes
come true to well these days

Maybe I am just paying some dues
or simply lost somewhere reflective
but life is far from auspicious
and a song of silence plays

Still I will not give up on me or you
no matter what anyone says
I will not give up on love that's true
and making better days
We will make better days

See The Rainbows

it is so hard for me to trust someone these days
one after another I find another who betrays
still I put myself in positions where I test someone's trust
seems I will not give up trying to find someone - or bust
here comes another bust

into every live a little rain must fall
a metaphor for tears that goes back many years
it happens to a heart that really gives it all
that may be why so many choose to give in to fears

and I wanted to understand
why people do that
I wanted to comprehend
the fear of love

so I give all my love
and trust people to care
I don't know why they don't
that leads to despair

it's the most beautiful feeling we can know
unconditional trust and honest love
it is what people seek in gods and how flowers grow
it is right here on Earth, not somewhere high above

we need to stand up to the rain
and dare to risk the pain
and give ourselves a chance to feel
true love is the realest real

we need to realize what life is for
don't let fear stop us anymore
we need to overcome our fears
and see the rainbows... through our tears

another bust, another betrayal
another loss, another fail
but will I put my heart in jail?
No ... No ... No
I raise my sail...

and sing
into every live a little rain must fall
a metaphor for tears that goes back many years
it happens to a heart that really gives it all
that may be why so many choose to give in to fears

I won't go, I won't go, I won't go

for it's
it's the most beautiful feeling we can know
unconditional trust and honest love
it is what people seek in gods and how flowers grow
it is right here on Earth, not somewhere high above

we need to stand up to the rain
and dare to risk the pain
and give ourselves a chance to feel
true love is the realest real

we need to realize what life is for
don't let fear stop us anymore
we need to overcome our fears
and see the rainbows... through our tears

The Gift

woke up, just laid in bed
went back to sleep a few times
nothing to do, but still not dead
so maybe i'll just dream of rhymes

and sometimes it is relaxing
and sometimes it is worrisome
and sometimes it is so taxing
to sleep too long, to become numb . . .


woke up, got out of bed
played some Ruzzle to wake my head
though about what to do next
played some Words with Friends instead

and sometimes it is relaxing
and sometimes it is a let down
and sometimes it is so taxing
to play too long, nothing gets done
a smile can become a frown . . .


woke up, got out of bed
just checked my text messages
saw what my best friend had said
remembered time passages

she asked me why I do not sleep at night
I started to get a little uptight
then I answered her with a rhyme
and suddenly as if I saw the light
and everything just seemed to be alright
yes everything was alright

I told her

Every day is good for me because I am alive
Even when I am depressed it's good
Cuz I am feeling and not numb, I know I'll survive
I'd explain it better if I could

I love the roller coaster of emotions
That is what this life is all about
From the calm to the scary commotions
Even when it seems I'm full of doubt

Even when I cry alone late at night
Even when I beg someone to save me
Deep inside I know everything's alright
Cuz I still have the gift this life gave me

The chance to breathe another breath
The chance to find out what comes next
A moment can change everything
That's all I need to know

To get up and take one more step
And realize I'm not done yet
Right now I can do anything
I am the star of my show
I decide where I should go
The wind is me and I can blow
And all I need to know

is...

The chance to breathe another breath
The chance to find out what comes next
A moment can change everything
That's all I need to know

This is all I need to know
To make it all good
I would explain it better
If I could . . .


So I woke up, got out of bed
and shook the cobwebs from me head
remembering I'm not yet dead
remembering the words I said

Yes I got up, took one more step
And realized I'm not done yet
Right now I can do anything
I am the star of my show
I decide where I should go
I am the wind and I can blow!
And all I need to know

I've got

The chance to breathe another breath
The chance to find out what comes next
A moment can change everything
That's all I need to know
I've got...

The chance to breathe another breath
The chance to find out what comes next
A moment can change everything
That's all I need to know...
to enjoy the show.

party moods

so the party moods
come right out of the blue
and it's nothing new
but it surprises me every time

I just need to remember

september, october
november, december
just need to remember
remember, remember
remember remember

how to find the party
that is always going on
somewhere in my head
something I said
I am not dead yet
no, still not dead

the highs are always just a breath away
the lows are just a death away
no matter what we do or say
the show will go on
and the music will play
and this truth will stay
no matter how low it gets today
the highs are just a breath away

and it's a wonderful feeling
to know there's no ceiling
and all the emotion
is an infinite ocean
of laughter and tears
across all the years
embrace all the fears
and overcome them now
this is how

mixed in with all the dreams of love
and the fairy tales and whatever's above
there is something real
right here to feel
if you just remember
just remember
the words were said
inside your head
you're still not dead
no, still not dead

the highs are always just a breath away
the lows are just a death away
no matter what we do or say
the show will go on
and the music will play
and this truth will stay
no matter how low it gets today
the highs are just a breath away

and it's a wonderful feeling
to know there's no ceiling
and all the emotion
is an infinite ocean
of laughter and tears
across all the years
embrace all the fears
and overcome them now
this is how

just remember this
a kiss is just a kiss
awareness suddenly appears
as emotion without fears
and you see rainbows through your tears

and the highs are always just a breath away
the lows are just a death away
no matter what we do or say
the show will go on
and the music will play
and this truth will stay
no matter how low it gets today
the highs are just a breath away

right out of the blue
nothing new

the way out of the blue

remember when the beatles sang love love love all you need is love, love, love, have you known true love, love, love do you dream of love, love love... still?...

well i do...

and i could write a song for every dream of love i've known
reality has not lasted as long
now finding someone who i want to trust leaves me alone
and a lonely love song just seems wrong

for love is about sharing
trusting and caring
it's not about fearing
fear will leave you blue

love is about healing
believing and feeling
it is about revealing
the true you in you

so if you ever find yourself giving up on reaching out
ask yourself if you really want to die
if you tell yourself you can live without what life's about
then you're not living life, you're living a lie

for love is about sharing
trusting and caring
it's not about fearing
fear will leave you blue

love is about healing
believing and feeling
it is about revealing
the true you in you

don't give up
don't fade away
don't give up
start again today
you can come out of your darkness
your closet or your hole
you can open your heart
and save your soul

for life is about sharing
trusting and caring
it's not about fearing
fear will leave you blue

life is about healing
believing and feeling
it is about revealing
the true you in you

and you can write a song for every dream of love you've known
even reality has not lasted as long
now if when you think of love you think you'd rather be alone
think a lonely love song just seems wrong

so if you think it's over
if all your hope seems gone
you still have a choice to make
give up or carry on

and if you want to give up
there's just one thing to do
repeat it over and over again
until you know it's true

love is about sharing
trusting and caring
it's not about fearing
fear will leave you blue

love is about healing
believing and feeling
it is about revealing
the true you in you

love is about sharing
trusting and caring
it's not about fearing
fear will leave you blue

love is about healing
believing and feeling
it is about revealing
the true you in you

peace comes from knowing this is true
hope is the way out of the blue
it's no secret, the heart always knew
and i hope you do too
i hope you will do what's good for you

for love is about sharing
trusting and caring
it's not about fearing
fear will leave you blue

and love is about healing
believing and feeling
it is about revealing
the true you in you

Rilke and you

it was midnight in another dream and a new letter was inspired...

Rilke and you, of course... once again you reach deeper into me than I wanted anyone to unless they were sitting beside me with arms wide open to hold me as I fall apart, trusting me to come back together as I always do... surviving the infinite abyss of endless desire... alone... the secret is...

it is not true love unless it scares you

(and then a song breaks out)



my lips have almost forgotten what desire means
for so long I've been missing my love
torn from my heart, breaking all my dreams
wounds like this are meant to always bleed
silently the moon cries every night
buried in subway halls
burned in airports
why do you think they call them terminals

and she loved it when I sang, I sang
if it takes forever, I will wait for you
and did I know that she was hearing
I will always love you

and when promising to love
until the end of time
do we really believe time can not end?

meanwhile, deep inside my this heart I know as my own...

I still mourn the loss of my first true love
a void so feared, an abyss so immense
thirty years have not diminished it's power to consume my passion
would a million?
three decades have not reduced it's intensity
time does not effect the inspiration I so fear
and still am so drawn to it
I live for it
and I would die to feel it
just one more time
again

today I live to embrace one who understands the need
one who will drink the blood of wounds meant to always bleed
one who will drink the tears of eyes meant always to cry
one who will find the child inside who knows the natural high
always laughing at the clouds
always waking up reborn
smiling from within the storm
feeling the peaceful eye
seeing through the pointless fears
seeing the rainbow through the tears

for you who understands
I reach out to warm your hands

no van gogh

i see the the blurry world of van gogh
oh
but that is not the way i want to go
even though i understand the suffering or knowing
and the fear of innocence and honesty
the fatigue of sixty years on
comes on strong
almost suddenly
as if it was a wall
always there waiting
to be run into

suddenly despair
swallows hope and energy
as apathy consumes
me

the sad comes out of the blue
waiting for someone to see through
waiting for someone to care
but no one seems to want to
so only the sad comes through

and yet i know the flip side
euphoria too
can suddenly come
out of the blue

waiting here for you

the point

maybe there is no other way to say to you today that i don't want to play delusion and dismay so take your rulebooks and your clay and make some other disarray in your own image you can pray someone like me might go away when someone like you comes to stay... but even if the whole thing was a lie... we can still dream of seeing eye to eye...

standards too high for this world at this time
life is the point foolishly declined
maybe find solace amusement in rhyme
meter allows thought to be left behind
all but the one line clearing the mind
in this moment this world is resigned
to be so inclined to leave us behind
fears at this time so acceptibly blind
miss the point and get left behind

selling delusion and calling it kind
the tables can turn never to find
we are the world we bade declined
and in the end we missed the point
and were all left behind

so caught up in how we might be designed
we missed the point and got left behind

waiting for something we may never find
we missed the point and got left behind

born with two eyes we closed to be blind
we missed the point and got left behind

fearing the truth we pretend lies are kind
we missed the point and got left behind

i just do (how am i to know, part two - that's some powerful stuff)

desires come
out of the blue
from misty morning memories
to here and now with you

desires come
as if they are new
time and time again they come
in and out of the blue

and sometimes they call to me so loudly
i can't hear anything else
sometimes even so boldly that
i forget about myself

you were the one who should me how
powerful desire could be
so is it any wonder now
this is my fantasy

to be with you
one more time
for all eternity

can a love this strong
be wrong?
(you tell me)
(what can be?)

can a love this strong
be wrong?
not for me

how am i to know?

it could be a hundred years
it still feels like yesterday
suddenly you're here with me
so real, oh could it be
i can feel you touch me

it comes right out of the blue
just as i've forgotten you
suddenly it all returns
suddenly my heart still yearns
suddenly the passion burns
the world turns

and i need to know
i need to know
I need to know

oh what should i do
should i still want you
should i let you go
how am i to know
when you don't say a word
at least none that i've heard
am i missing something
can you hear me sing

am i just buried deeper than you want to go
or am i forgotten and will i ever know
should i stop wondering and just let go
oh oh, how can i know which way to go
oh oh oh, oh oh, oh oh

so what can i say about what happened yesterday
if it is forgotten does it matter anyway
is there any feeling when certain songs play
is it meaningless noise or something
you just push away

oh oh oh oh, do you want me to stay
oh oh oh oh, how am i to know
if you never say

am i supposed to read your silence
as wishing i would would understand
how afraid you are of losing me
am i supposed to take your hand
or just accept your silence
as the closing of a door
are you trying to tell me
you don't want me any more

has too much time passed for love to last
or there still an endless glow
in the window of your heart for me
how am i supposed to know

oh what should i do
should i still want you
should i let you go
how am i to know
when you don't say a word
at least none that i've heard
am i missing something
can you hear me sing

am i just buried deeper than you want to go
or am i forgotten and will i ever know

oh oh oh oh, do you want me to stay or go
oh oh oh oh, how am i to know

the science of faith

the universe may be infinite and there may be infinite universes, even is that does not make any logical sense semantically or rationally or in any way the human mind can comprehend at the moment so what is a scientist to do, take it on faith?... whether you believe in gods or dogs, in the rosetta stone or the rosetta mission, in an infinite universe or a quantum multiverse, unless you believe in nothing (which is still believing in something, though we will leave that path for another time), would you be afraid to blink if everything changed with every blinked?... the predominance of fear in human perception is quelled by some of the strangest things, delusions, mathematics, fantasies, and the favorite, the power of conformity, the acceptance of a finite idea called truth by the masses... majority rules, even when majority is wrong... it is not fair to anyone who sees beyond the accepted limits, especially when in almost every case, human fear seeks to destroy those reaching beyond accepted limits, but that is the history of humanity so far, alas, so before you ask which universe are we in, ask yourself what is your truth and that will likely define your answer to everything...

infinite fractals beyond perception
seeks belief to exist
string theory plus quantum conception
entanglement assist
reason and logic enters suspension
blind the top of the list
the mind of god is beyond comprehension
everything else is missed

what you believe defines you
even if you think you believe nothing
what you believe designs you
even if silence is the song you sing

are you ready for mass extinction
or do you live in mass delusion
where truth and lies have no distinction
you are the maker of your illusion

black holes, light years, dark matter, inflation
miracles may simply be what you cannot explain
blind faith, second sight, everything in relation
everything is everywhere can drive a mind insane

what fear is stronger
what's been around longer
fear of the unknown
or fear of not knowing

to be or not to be
is relativity
what is you, what is me
what is infinity
what is eternity
what do you want to see
makes your reality
even if it's fantasy

what you believe defines you
even if you think you believe nothing
what you believe designs you
even if silence is the song you sing

can it become more clear
you find what you seek here
genius or madness or bliss or fear
whatever you want will appear
when you believe you are aware
when you are aware

what you believe defines you
even if you think you believe nothing
what you believe designs you
even if silence is the song you sing

just when it's needed

whatever it is

could have been 9:13

almost a year went by before another entry appeared here and then, others appeared here as if they were there all along making the almost year without an entry disappear as if it was never even there, which only goes to prove that time is relative out of the blue, i mean, as if anybody really knows what time it is when someone asks what time is it?...

yes, it could have been 9:13, after all...